Mely Speaks

A Single Mom's Adventures in Awesomeness

Archive for category Work It Girl Wednesday

Work It Girl Wednesday: I need your help

Nov 24

Posted by Mely in The First Year of Singlehood, Work It Girl Wednesday | No Comments

So as you’ve probably noticed, I’ve been skipping out on Work It Girl Wednesday. I know, I know. I hate it as much as you do but it seems since I’m working so much, some things have fallen behind and I’m strugglin to “work it.”

The thing is, as much as I love Work it Girl Wednesday, writing the post takes me some time so I need all of your help until I work out the kinks and figure out how to balance everything as a working mom.

What I need you all to do is rally for me and help me with the posts. Instead of me picking single moms to be featured, I want you to.

Send me an email at mely@melyspeaks.com with who you want to nominate and why. Please put Work It Girl Wednesday in your subject line. Also, make sure to include a link to their blog in your email.

I will randomly pick one of the nominees each week to be featured here.

Thanks for your help!

XOXO
Mely

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This Biotch Rocks Thursday: Singlemomma cc

Nov 5

Posted by Mely in The First Year of Singlehood, Work It Girl Wednesday | 4 Comments

Did you ever have one of those days where you need to get slapped in the face? A day where you’re all “Boo Hoo, woe is me,” cowering in a corner or laying under your covers, waiting for someone to come save you?  

Well, I have them repeatedly.

In fact, waiting for people to come bail me out seems to have been a constant thing in my life. My mother so often says that when things gets tough I have a tendency to throw my hands up in the air, let my head sink beneath the water, and just wait for someone to pull me out.

I hate when she’s right.

It’s obvious that I have the flight syndrome, rather than the fight.

I know that they say holding on to anger isn’t good for you but my experience has been that it is one of the only things that push me forward. Without anger to drive me, I fall behind. I get all mushy and sentimental and I lose my focus on the things that are really important.

I hate to say it, but I become a pushover.

Lucky for me, when I am having a wishy washy time, fate steps in and throws me a sharp right hook via a fellow single momma.

Enter  singlemomma_cc:

singlemommma cc

 

 I love this bitch because she is everything I am not, but secretly wish I could be. She’s like the superhero of single moms; feisty, strong willed, kicking ass and taking names, a survivor. She’s driven and passionate and doesn’t give a crap what you or anyone else thinks of her. She’s the anti-wishy wash and I’m pretty sure she might also be the anti-Christ.

This momma of one blogs over at Not Your Average Single Momma and I assure you she is everything but average. If you’re not clicking on the link to her blog yet, you’re an asshat. She is FABULOUS, with an emphasis on the F and the U.

To put it simply, THIS BIOTCH ROCKS in every way, shape, and form.

Thank you, lady. You’ve inspired me to get back in the game and to not be afraid to play dirty.

Now where are my brass knuckles?

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Work It Girl Wednesday… Eh, I didn’t get to it.

Nov 4

Posted by Mely in The First Year of Singlehood, Work It Girl Wednesday | 2 Comments

Yes lovies, I am well aware that it is Work It Girl Wednesday, now 6:30 pm, and I have yet to do my post that you all are expecting.

Shame on me.

Seriously, I need to work on my time management skills. I’m having some difficulty.

Blogging has been my only job for the past four months but now that I actually have a job that pays, that I must leave my house to do, I’m struggling to juggle it all.

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE bare with me while I get into a routine.

So…. since it is obvious that I am not going to get my Work It Girl Wednesday post finished before midnight, I’m making tomorrow “This Bi-otch Rocks Thursday.” It’s just for this week. The woman that I am featuring is so kick ass anyway that she deserves a special honor, so I think this is working out for the better.

Come back tomorrow. You don’t want to miss out :-)

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Work It Girl Wednesday: Desiree

Oct 28

Posted by Mely in The First Year of Singlehood, Work It Girl Wednesday | 1 Comment

I’ve gone through some amazing changes the past few weeks.

For the first time in a long time, I feel alive. Maybe it’s because I’m hitting that six month mark.

It’s hard to believe it’s almost been half a year since I became a single mom. There was a time when I felt so broken I thought I couldn’t make it through a day, and yet somehow days turned to weeks, and weeks turned to months, and now I find myself happy and almost whole.

The soul’s ability to heal is such an incredible thing.

There were many times I felt alone and so I wrote, hoping someone out there would hear me. By some twist of fate, you did.

How lucky am I?

I’m pretty sure today’s Work It Girl Wednesday honoree feels exactly the same way about her readers.

Meet Desiree.

desiree_mar09

This amazing single mother of two just made the 2,100 mile move from Colorado to New Jersey. That alone makes her worthy of a Work It Girl Wednesday feature!

Desiree blogs over at Writing To Sanity where she chronicles her day to day adventures as a mom. She also contributes to the New Jersey Moms Blog as well as for the moms blog on Working Mother Magazine’s website.

Ahhh, a momma after my own heart who likes to busy herself with numerous blogging projects. Gotta love it!

I absolutely love her posts. She’s an incredibly talented writer who is full of heart. What do I like most about her? She’s positive and uplifting and makes me want to run out and do something even when I don’t feel like it.

She’s a fellow survivor of a broken heart, and just like me she is proving that there is life after all the heartache if you keep moving forward and follow your destiny.

Check out her personal blog and follow her and her children’s newest adventures while discovering all that is the garden state.

Desiree, keep on Workin It! You inspire me more than you may ever know.

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Work It Girl Wednesday: Sharee

Sep 30

Posted by Mely in The First Year of Singlehood, Work It Girl Wednesday | No Comments

If you’re stopping by today to hear all the sordid details about my make out session last night, you’ll have to wait.

I’m so evil aren’t I?

Today’s post is reserved for someone else’s story. What, did you forget it’s Work It Girl Wednesday? I hope not!

This week’s featured single momma is truly inspirational. Meet Sharee:

Sharee

Sharee hails from my neighbor state of Pennsylvania. *waves* A hard working public relations professional, mother to one 4-year-old boy, and a great writer, she’s definitely got it going on.

Seriously, can you come and show me how to balance it all Sharee?

While she is no longer in a romantic relationship with her son’s father, she’s one of those lucky single moms who still gets along with her ex.

I thought that was an urban myth but she has proved me wrong. Wonders never cease…

This hot momma blogs over at Moms Agenda. Although she was out of the blogging game for a bit, she’s getting her groove back.

Her blog posts are like memos: records of things she has accomplished, what she hopes to get done, lists of things she likes. Her entries are a bit of organization in her sometimes not so organized world.

The best thing about her blog: I haven’t read one bit of negativity on it. It’s upbeat, optimistic and full of love; truly inspiring.

Take a bow Sharee because you are most definitely Workin It!

The rest of you, go check out her blog and bask in the sunshine that is Sharee’s life. You won’t regret it.

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Work It Girl Wednesday: Shelly

Sep 23

Posted by Mely in The First Year of Singlehood, Work It Girl Wednesday | 1 Comment

Oh sweet hump day, we meet again. And you know what that means folks? It’s time for another rousing addition of Work It Girl Wednesday.

I can hear you all cheering.

First off, I’d like to thank my readers for supporting my decision to honor myself last week. It’s always nice to get props for kissing up to myself.

Have you appreciated yourself yet today? Give yourself a hug, or at least a nice ass slap. Come on, you deserve it, because if you’re reading this blog you most definitely kick ass.

Now that that’s taken care of, let’s get down to business.

Meet Shelly:

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A rockin mother of two, Shelly blogs over at My Life as I Live It, and I must say she is completely adorable. She writes from the heart, and to me, that’s what blogging should be about.

I like to think of her site as a one stop shop for all things emotional. Her posts are filled with humor, truth, love and hate. It’s not often that you can indulge in all of those things in one place.

Through divorce, illness, dating, working, and just plain living, she’s taking singlemommyhood by the horns and wrestling her to the ground.

Let’s face it, sometimes that bitch can make you chase her down and shoot her in the ass with a tranquillizer in order to get your shit together.

Shelley’s got her gun armed and ready for such circumstances.

Give her a call if you ever need back up.

Some of my favorite posts are the ones where she details the relationship she’s developing with the new man in her life. I can’t wait to see how it turns out as I’m now living vicariously through her love life.

*Passing the popcorn*

A loving mother, a hot lady and feisty bitch, Shelly is definitely Workin It!

You go Momma!

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Work It Girl Wednesday : Mely

Sep 16

Posted by Mely in The First Year of Singlehood, Work It Girl Wednesday | 8 Comments

I know this breaks all the rules, but damn it I am pretty proud of myself this week so I think I deserve a pat on the back.

For the first time in 4 months, 17 days, 4 hours and 36 minutes, I feel different inside.

I feel as if I have exorcised my ex.

The events of the past two weeks made me realize I was holding on to something that wasn’t there anymore and would never be again. And I can now see that maybe I was also holding on because I was afraid of being open to what else or who else is out there.

As infuriated as I was at jerzelady’s comment about my letter to my ex, it set me free.

Although I have a sinking suspicion that she doesn’t even exist and that it was a family member or my ex himself egging me on so there was no turning back.

Whoever it was, I thank you for antagonizing me and pushing me to send it to my ex. Those words were things I had wanted to say for months, years even, but I was afraid to because I knew they would be the end of an era.

I’m not afraid anymore.

I found my balls. And these aren’t the balls my ex lost because they are WAY bigger. These are mine and mine alone and they are catapulting me into happiness.

So I guess I’m on the Breakover wagon again, only this time I don’t know if I even want to include the word break in it as that is something in my past.

 I’m not broken anymore, I don’t give a shit that my ex broke-up with me any longer, and the only kind of break in my future will be some break-dancing.

And the possible breaking of men’s hearts, unintentionally of course, if they want me but I’m not feeling it.

So I’d like to dedicate this Work It Girl Wednesday post to me.

 

karaoke3

I’m foxy, intelligent, and funny and I’m Workin’ it.

My biggest accomplishment this week: I hardly flinched when my ex told me he was getting a lawyer to take me back to court to reduce his child support payments. A month ago I would’ve let it ruin my whole day but this time I rolled with it. It was nice to finally have control of my emotions instead of allowing him to.

Go me!

If you’re still looking for more single mom inspiration, go back and re-read my past Work It Girl Wednesday posts because all those ladies I featured are still workin’ it too!

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Work It Girl Wednesday: Aljolynn

Sep 9

Posted by Mely in The First Year of Singlehood, Work It Girl Wednesday | No Comments

Sorry I’m a bit late today lovies.

A bit of sulking and a whole lot of writers block left me slow moving. The events of the past few days have left me uneasy, but I am so thankful to do this post as the women I feature always inspire me to pick myself up and keep moving forward.

 I enjoy a good pity party, more often than I should. It’s something about the crying, how it releases all the pent up feelings and has the potential to cleanse your soul.

The problem is I can often get caught up in it and stay too long, way after the cake and the presents, long after the other guests have left.

 You see, I tend to wear out my welcome.

Luckily I have inspirational women like today’s featured momma to help me out.

Their stories pick me up, drag me kicking and screaming out the door, and put me in a cab in the right direction.

Wanna meet today’s kick ass mom?

Here she is: Aljolynn

Aljolynn

Aljolynn is a beautiful single mom to an oh-so-adorable little boy. She gets extra points for coolness in my book because she has excellent taste in baby names as her son and mine share the same first name.

She writes touching and candid posts over at her blog Restless Mama.

I especially love her September features that are written to her “bambino.”  Since his first birthday is quickly approaching, she decided to dedicate the bulk of her post this month to him and they melt my heart.

What a wonderful tribute to her soul mate.

Aljolynn’s strength has touched me more than she may ever know.

Her son’s father is not in the picture and hasn’t been since before her child was born. As I read her post detailing the events that led to his absence, I couldn’t help but get emotional.

I could be in her shoes.

When I first told my son’s father I was pregnant he bailed. As you can imagine he wasn’t ready for such responsibility, which I can understand.

To my surprise he resurfaced a few months later with a change of heart. In Aljolynn’s case, her son’s father did not.

I admire her for accepting that fact and pushing forward. She hasn’t even had contact with him since her son’s birth. It takes a strong woman to persevere and raise a child alone.

Aljolynn, thank you for moving me to push forward as well. If you can do it, I can too.

Keep on workin it!

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Work It Girl Wednesday: Erin

Sep 2

Posted by Mely in The First Year of Singlehood, Work It Girl Wednesday | 2 Comments

Time for another round of inspiration lovies.

This week’s Work It Girl Wednesday star is Erin aka singlemomsong.

Erin II

What’s unique about this 39-year-old single mom you ask? She’s in a category all her own.

She refers to herself as a “single mom by choice.”

This is a different kind of single parent who I believe has more balls than the rest of us.

Erin’s “baby daddy” didn’t leave her after making promises he couldn’t keep, he simply was never there.

When she found out she was pregnant, she knew she would be going it alone for the duration but made the choice to be a mother anyway.

If that’s not courageous, I don’t know what is.

I was freaked out enough when I was 25 and pregnant, even with the father of my son standing beside me. I couldn’t imagine the fear that would’ve taken over had he initially bailed and left me all alone to care for our child. At that point I wasn’t even sure I was capable of being a good mother.

It takes a strong woman to be able to handle that. That woman is Erin.

When she isn’t at school pursuing her second degree in Education or running after her 3-year-old daughter, she’s blogging over at Single Mom Blog.

Her stories are engaging and real. The portions of her single mom journey that she has shared thus far are nothing short of inspirational.

One of my favorite posts is Weekends are Hard in which she talks about the trials and tribulations of entertaining her daughter full time on Saturdays and Sundays.

It relieved some of my own guilt as I have often had the same feelings of dread when figuring out how to occupy my son on weekends. His playmates from two parent homes are engulfed in family time which leaves me, just like Erin, to amuse him, alone.

You moms know what a daunting task that can be, even if some of you won’t admit it.

Erin shares the good, the bad and the sometimes ugly truth about being a single mom and for that I applaud her.

Right now, I’m asking you all to rise to the occasion and give her the standing ovation she so deserves.

Erin, as imperfect as you might think your life is, you’re workin’ it and that’s why we love you.

Work it girl!

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Work It Girl Wednesday: Erin

Aug 26

Posted by Mely in The First Year of Singlehood, Work It Girl Wednesday | 5 Comments

Oh Work It Girl Wednesday, how I love thee.

Did I ever tell you guys that it is my favorite post to do each week?

Why? Because it jogs my memory of how strong I am and how I have an army of other single mom’s behind me, pushing me forward and supporting me.

Sure, some of them I don’t talk to directly, but just reading their blogs gives me inspiration. Looking at their successes and failures opens my eyes to the fact that I’m not the first woman to go through this, and I certainly won’t be the last.

And most importantly, they remind me that it WILL get easier.

This week’s Work It Girl Wednesday honoree is Erin, aka @irasciblecrayon.

Erin

Erin blogs over at Irascible Crayons, her own wonderful creation.

She’s a 23-year-old single mom to a 3-year-old girl, currently working her butt off to finalize her degree in Special and Elementary Education.

That alone makes her my inspiration because I have had a dream of being a teacher for a very long time, but had succumbed to the idea that at 30-years-old it was never going to happen. Evidently I was wrong. If this momma can do it, so can I!

You go girl!

Erin and I share a special bond, we were both in the unwed mothers club. There’s a secret hand shake and everything.

But seriously, we are rare, well maybe not so rare but there are very few of us that are brave enough to publicly attest to being members, so this very fact makes me adore her even more.

Erin has been a single mother since her daughter was 2 months old, so she isn’t new to the single parent scene. She’s a poet, photographer, and also a veteran blogger as she has been doing it for over a year.

Her blog is filled with wisdom and love. It’s not so much the kind of writing that makes you laugh but more of the kind that makes you feel, in the best possible way.

It’s touching and moving; to put it simply it’s awe-inspiring.

Check out her latest post on Acceptance. It made me throw my hands up in the air and scream “YES!”

She’s an amazing writer with a heart of gold. Whether you’re single or married, man or woman, there’s something you will find to love about Erin. You’d be a fool not to add her to your blogroll.

Erin, you’re Workin It! Thanks for diligently sharing your life with the rest of us. We’re the lucky ones.

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